Beginnings and Endings


I wonder if I have lost my ability to speak on paper, or rather, on a computer screen. It has been a while since I have even thought about putting words up on a screen. In real time and in real life, I do not have a problem talking about almost everything, especially if it is Christ centered, I can go on for hours. Just ask my closest friend here. We talked for hours. Eight hours was normal for us. Luis, my husband, would take himself off to a corner and let us be. He truly is an amazing man.

It all ended yesterday.

God had been telling my friend that her time here is done and so, for the last few months she had been wrapping things up amidst tears and angst as well as joy in looking ahead to what God has in store for her. Yesterday, she walked through the gate to board her plane and an era ended.

The weird thing is that this time around, for the first time in my entire life, I was not the one going through the gates and boarding airplanes to leave people behind. I was the one left behind on this side of the gate. And one thing keeps going through my mind: this is where I can put down roots. This is not a short stint. I don’t have to think about moving.

I don’t have to wonder about when I have to move. I am letting this sink in.

It is a really good feeling. Tempered with the sadness that I am the one who now has to feel the loss of a dear friend keenly. One who is a kindred spirit in the Lord. One whom I have seen grown so much in the Lord in the two years I have known her. One whom I know God has amazing plans for.

The thing with saying goodbyes all the time, I have learned to let go; learned to accept that I may never see those dear people again on this side of heaven. I have learned that friendships change, and as much as we try to work at it, our lives take on different paths and with some friendships, there are no longer shared similar interests that bond us together. And that is okay. That is how life is.

Then, there are those friendships that are eternal. Friends whom you never talk to for years, yet, when you meet again,┬áthe conversation thread picks up like nothing ever happened. That is when you know you are blessed and you need to be so thankful for them and for God for having brought you all together at one point of time in the past. When I look back to how I met my closest friends, those moments seemed so insignificant, so ordinary then. Like a supposedly chance meeting at a university dorm barbecue; a kind word spoken from one to another at church; a random walk from a restaurant to someone’s house; an opportune yet unexpected visit of a stranger to one’s home; meeting someone on their birthday and then proceeding to offend them immensely, sitting next to someone at a church service and mistaking them for another person…..when we look back and see how God worked through the most insignificant things to initiate something so important in our lives, we can only marvel.

Never despise the day of small beginnings, so says the beginning of Zechariah 4:10. Small seeds, small roots, small shoots all grow into big trees one day. I am so grateful that God has allowed me to see these seeds of friendship grow over the years to become big friendship trees today. And it is not only in the area of friendship that I see how everything began with small, seemingly insignificant beginnings.

The thing with God is, everything and everyone has significance and a purpose. You, dear reader, are not at all insignificant to God. In Him, you have a purpose and you are so loved. If you don’t know that already, I hope you will know and believe that now.

Did I say I believed I had lost my ability to pen words to computer screen? I guess I was wrong.